“We always advise couples to resolve their differences amicably. Consult faith-based institutions where they belong. Consult their family members because the union was born out of two families.”
It has been reported that a 46-year-old civil servant, Patrick Markson, committed suicide by drinking a poisonous substance after murdering his wife, Hannah Markson, in her sleep with the use of a sledgehammer on Thursday, leaving behind their six children.
At the location of the incident, Odede Street Off Tombia-Amassoma Road, Ede-pie, Yenagoa, Bayelsa State, the elder sister of the deceased, Timinipre Bufuru, gave the following account: “When we do the contract finish, me, money wey I pay am (#800,000), e no give am one naira. So, she come dey vex say ah ahn, my elder sister follow you work, all this money you don use am finish. So from there na im dey get problem.”
Victor Kubor, a friend of the deceased also gave his account of what transpired some weeks before the incident. “They were having issues, marital and family issues two weeks ago, I was here when he complained to me. I told him that we should try and see; he should take it easy, but unfortunately, he did not come to meet me again. This morning, a friend of ours called me on the phone that Hannah is late.”
Dickson Oyakumegbagha, a relative of the deceased said: “When I ran to the scene, I saw the snipper and the sledgehammer. That thing is very big and from all what I saw, I knew that the woman was in a deep sleep and he did that.”
The Public Relations Officer of the Nigerian Police, Bayelsa Command, Asinim Butswat, issued some piece of advice while confirming the story: “We have commenced investigation and they will carry out post-mortem investigation on the corpse to actually determine the cause of death. We always advise couples to resolve their differences amicably. Consult faith-based institutions where they belong. Consult their family members because the union was born out of two families.”
The occurrence of domestic violence amongst couples has not ceased to rent some space in different news feeds as often as it could. Last year December 2020, Ifeyinwa Angbo showed up on social media with a battered face complaining of the severe beating she has suffered from her husband of six years, Pius Angbo. Reactions immediately followed the release of the video with people suggesting divorce; some, separation; and a few, self-evaluation.
On a YouTube page, Naija Latest News, the YouTuber gave what he thought was the best thing for her to do at the moment saying that it was easy for single people to talk about divorce, but the best thing for her to do was to find a place and stay there for a while, then her husband will come looking for her. A funny spontaneous response to that advice in the Igbo language could be ‘Ọ chọhozị, i kpọọru ya police’, meaning, ‘if he does not look for her, you call the police’. The next development showed after this gory report was an intervention of a Governor in reconciling the couple by giving out doses of fatherly advice; any wonder we keep repeating patterns?
We forget so soon about cases of murder that have stemmed from domestic violence over the years. When bodily illness surfaces, it is not hard to recommend a medical doctor. When there is a need to commute, a driver comes to mind. When a person goes to the mechanic for cloth shopping, we suspect they are insane. But when there is a need for mental/emotional health care and treatment, ‘Tom, Dick and Harry’ becomes an expert patching up mental/emotional wounds with plasters of advice backed up with faulty testimonials; the title ‘governor’ becomes a professional. Security personnel who would encourage all citizens (regardless of religion and family) to observe security measures now recommend faith-based institutions and family members as a go-to solution centre for mental and emotional problems in a heterogeneous religious country.
The neglect of the urgency of mental and emotional health care and treatment has made accessibility to its care expensive to the average Nigerian because the practitioners that hold up this scepter of change are sole proprietors
Many of the faith-based institutions would strictly quote ‘God hates divorce’ or ‘for the sake of God,’ but forget the ‘flee-from-every-appearance-of-evil’ quote. Families who need help themselves would vehemently declare ‘make your marriage work no matter what’ or ‘for the sake of the children,’ yet they cannot explain the reason why such rationale- for children’s sake, never brings back the dead. This has made the beautiful and honourable institution of marriage seem like a dreadful union.
The neglect of the urgency of mental and emotional health care and treatment has made accessibility to its care expensive to the average Nigerian because the practitioners that hold up this scepter of change are sole proprietors. The government’s partnership with them would promote patronage and affordability to this priceless practice. But how can the thoughts of partnership emerge where it does not even pop up as an option in the minds of our leaders? We have seen the ripple effect of this neglect in our National Assembly occasionally, turning into the house of louts as people, punches, and objects fill the air impacting their recipient(s). It is common knowledge that the family is the smallest functional unit of the society; however, it is fictitious to build a house from the roof.
Our country’s motto is ‘unity and faith, peace and progress,’ and, understandably, we are cosmopolitan and religious; nonetheless, our solution is the figurative saying ‘give unto Caesar what is Caesar’s.’ We must rise to the task of building our nation from one of its fundamentals- mental and emotional health care by making it a priority to assist and accord mental/emotional health practitioners their space in the society. If not, we will continue the count of our losses and witness the derailment of our country.
♦ Favour Chiagozie Ebubechukwu is an Editorial Staff Writer and columnist with the WAP
